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Episode 81
Sarah woke up. First she looked over at Andrew's broken body with kindness in her eyes. This is all unbelievable, she thought. All the things that would have happened.
Then she got up and completely got ready, went to the kitchen and started fixing breakfast. She wanted to do it because she wanted to do something physical for him to show where she is at. So she looked up a pancake mix and made pancakes one by one, keeping them warm under a warmer. Then she started with the bacon and scrambled eggs, potatoes, and the orange juice. She managed all of them, and she set aside a little bunch of eggs and toast for little Alice. She was busy doing this for her family; she just wanted things to return to normal. 🥞🍳
About that time, when everything was ready, Andrew got woken up by Alice. All he could hear was her jumping around in her crib, so he got out of bed, got dressed, and went into her room to pick her up.
She obviously was really stinky inside. "Oh, little girl, what did you eat last night?" he said with a joke. "Time for a nappy change." He had started calling them nappies because he thought it sounded better than diapers, chuckling to himself. 🍼👶
He got her ready, went up, and brought little Alice to the table and strapped her in. "Oh, honey," he said, "this looks delicious. I see you made pancakes also."
She responded, "Yes, I tried my best, but you know, I don't know if they turned out well because..."
He took a bite of everything, chewing thoughtfully before looking up at her. "It all tastes good, honey. And thank you. You didn't have to do this. I normally make breakfast." ☕
She responded, "I know. But I wanted to do this for you, because we're trying to get back on track."
Suddenly, little Alice took her little plastic fork and flung a piece of egg. It flew right through the air and landed right on her mother’s shirt. Little Alice bounced up and down in her high chair, giggling and thinking it was absolutely hilarious. 😂
"Oh, baby," Sarah said, looking down at her shirt and then back at the toddler. "I think you're going to play volleyball or softball. You have quite the arm," she said jokingly.
That made Andrew chuckle. "Yes, she likes to fling her food at people and she thinks it's funny. But at least she eats most of her food more than flinging it. We just have to clean a little bit of it every time. It brings her joy, so who am I to say no?"
Sarah laughed. "Well, I think you take after your father. You know how he always got into trouble."
They laughed and chuckled together, she got him a fresh cup of coffee, and she got herself a fresh cup of tea as little Alice banged her sippy cup against the table. It was laughing and joking. They finished up their meal and went out to the couch with Alice, allowing Alice to roam around on the floor. 🛋️
Then the uncomfortable quiet came. She was dreading asking, but she said, "Now that we have this breakfast all done, Andrew, what's... how much pain are you really in? And be honest with me," she said with compassionate eyes. ❤️🩹
Andrew took a deep breath. "I'm in pain. I'm in a lot of pain. You know, when you get stabbed many places, flung over the cliff, bashed by rocks, and here you are a stroke survivor... it is painful. I'm in real pain. But what I refuse to do is go on pain medication that I get addicted to. It is very easy to get addicted. I think that will cost you not being in pain you want... I want it more and more of it. So I'm just not going to do it. I'm just going to live with the pain."
Sarah heard this, and her heart went out to him. He was in pain but he still had a smile on his face, still playing with Alice, and still being the husband. So she was very proud of him at this point, but something—she didn't know why it was on her mind—made her feel distracted. She knew what it was, but she didn't know how to explain it to Andrew. How could she explain it and not have him... 😔
She didn't know how to bring it up with him. How to soften what she secretly was feeling. She loved Andrew, but she had an emotional secret... and everything was beginning to go so well between them. But she knew, with the absolute focus on truth now in their marriage, she had to say it. Even if it hurt him. 🤫💔
